30 Ways to Annoy Dr Whovians
by Sola the Sunreaver
Summary: If you are a Doctor Who fan: Beware!  This is a ways to annoy.  I wrote this after my friend couldn't stop talking about it.  I'm sorry fans, I really do love the show, but the constant raving about it bugs the hell out of me


30 Ways to Annoy Dr. Whovians

Dr. Who… it's really not a bad show. I mean, good plotline, long running, funny… but when you are forced to hear about it every day, and listen as your friends count down the days one by one till the new season starts… it's enough to drive everyone else crazy. That's why we must take up arms and do things like…

Write a horrible fanfiction (Spell things wrong, come up with ridiculous pairings for characters, ect.) and then post it on the web for everybody to see.

Scream loudly every time someone mentions the Doctor. When they ask you about it, give absolutely no reason whatsoever.

Constantly bother them with questions like, "Why does he wear bow ties?" or "shouldn't he be dead? I mean, he's 907 years old" When they try to explain, stare at them blankly like you don't understand.

Keep mentioning how many female companions the doctor has. Constantly ask them why he does.

If they make you watch the show, pay attention for about 5 minutes, then pretend (Or really do) to fall asleep.

Stare at them. Don't blink or turn away. When they move, scream and run away.

Tell them you've got something better than a sonic screwdriver… you have a sonic paperclip…

Say that you saw a hidden video on the web that showed the first episode of the new season, and when they ask you what happens in it, or beg you to tell them where you saw it, say you'll tell them if they pay you money. Try to get as much off them as possible, and then give them the link to a dog washing business in Southern Japan.

When they start talking about Dr. Who, start a conversation with your neighbor on Harry Potter. Completely ignore what they are saying and bring the subject up to whether Dumbledore is gay or not.

Tell them you're getting them Dr. Who paraphernalia for their birthday. Give them Lord of the Rings instead.

Constantly get the 10th doctor confused with Barty Crouch Jr.

Alternative to #11, constantly call him a Scotsman.

Point out TARDIS has the word tard in it.

Come up with ridiculous theories on the show, such as the Doctor is gay, or that Amy Pond is an evil robot alien.

Wonder aloud what the Doctor's real name is. Try coming up with the most ridiculous names you can think of.

Tell them the writer of the show is in the hospital, and that he has Bovine Cancer (yeah, we don't know what that is either).

Tell them the show has been canceled. Ask them how they could have missed it, it was on national television. When they watch the news that night and say they didn't see it, say "Oh I'm so sorry, it was on Ugandan television, not American. See if they actually watch it. Keep it going for as long as possible. "No sorry, it was Russian."

Point out that David Tenant's eyes go in different directions. Ask them if he's mentally retarded.

Another alternative to #8. Say you have David Tenant's autograph. Charge them massive amounts of money for it.

Come to school all somber. Dress in black, and cry at regular intervals. When they ask what's wrong, say you can't believe that they are killing the Doctor off for good in the new season. And that a new Time Lord with the demeanor of Barney and a girl like Britney Spears is replacing him.

Pretend you've never even heard of Dr. Who. When they try to explain, say "So a guy with two hearts and a _girl companion _travel around in a time and space traveling police box battling what looks like trash cans with metal bumps? Weird, and here I thought the British were already wacked enough!"

Whenever they mention The Doctor, say "Doctor Who?" (Sorry, that was really lame…)

Get a bunch of Dr. Who plushies, and burn them right in front of the Whovians. Give them a creepy smile all the time you're doing it.

Tell them you're hosting a Dr. Who party at your house at 12:00 at night. When they show up, act totally confused and say you never invited them.

Whenever they mention Dr. Who, say, "Doctor Who? I love that show!" Give them the Spock sign and say "Live long and prosper" act totally confused when they tell you it's the wrong show.

Get all of their names wrong. "Oh, Professor Who? Amy Lake? River Screech?"

Give them a screenplay of Dr. Who. But when they get to the good part, the other half is replaced with Twilight.

Tell them you have Matt Smith's number. Give them the number to the local police station.

Find every single Dr. Who item on their computer and delete it.

Download some nice Pokémon episodes for them to replace the awful Dr. Who ones you deleted on their computer in #29.


End file.
